Make your marriage sex passionate
By Tussy Afam-Obi
Tuesday, March 6, 2007

In the beginning, marriage sex was outrageous and passionate.
In those moments when you weren't ripping each other's clothes off, you replayed in your mind the sex of that morning, the sheer force of your orgasm, the words s/he spoke over lunch or in bed, and the subtle looks your lover passed your way. You daydreamed about your lover's naked body and the sex that you will have that evening. Your heart pumped faster, your breathing became shallow and you felt that pleasant warm tingle between your legs. In the beginning, sex took over your body and your mind.

But as time goes by, marriage sex changes. Your sex-intoxicated mind gradually sobers up and returns to work, responsibility and the other aspects of your marriage and life in general. And soon enough those last, hazy bits and pieces of yourself straighten up and soon you realize that you know each other so well. You can predict his every move and he can predict yours. Boredom sets in!

If you feel this way, then it's time to relight the fire and bring passion and excitement back into your bedroom. Here are a few ideas on how to go about it.
Be adventurous! The bedroom isn't the only place where you can date your husband or wife.

One of the best ways to make routine marriage sex a little more wild and exciting is to change the atmosphere.
If you aren't into having sex in the park or in the dark alleys, there is an easy solution. Just by getting out of the bedroom, you add an element of excitement to marriage sex. Making love on the kitchen table or on the living room carpet is safe, clean, private, and oh so passionate.

Talk about sex
Do you find it awkward, embarrassing or difficult to talk with your husband or wife about what feels good in sex, what feels great and what feels out of this world? Part of learning about the wonderful act of sex is finding out what feels best to you, your erotic areas. This requires that both of you take time to touch and caress all parts of each other's body while sharing with each other your experience. Your goal is to find what sensitive areas of your body help you enjoy sex the most.
Sexual fears, taboos and attitudes as well as withheld negative feelings and secrets choke off spontaneity, energy and pleasure in marriage sex. Sharing sexual fears and sex secrets as well as sexual peak experiences and sexual fantasies is a powerful way to deepen the intimacy in your relationship and boost the passion meter in your marriage.

Try a little spontaneity. Instead of making love only at night after the kids are in bed, seduce your husband or wife when the urge strikes. Flirt with your partner in public. Showing him/her that he/she is desirable will feed the flames and send you two running for the bedroom.
Put a sexy note (a description of your favorite fantasy) in your partner's briefcase or car. Call your husband or wife at work during a lunch break (or send him/her an e-mail) and tell him/her exactly what you want to do to him/her after work - and DO it later.

Make love just before you are expecting company. The urgency of the sex and the forbidden secret will keep you hot for a week.
Food can lead up to lovemaking, but why not eat after sex? That way your stomach isn't full, and you won't fall asleep right after sex because you'll both be hungry. Actually, you could also take a lovemaking break between the main course and dessert.