| A randy man asked
me out when I was 9 months pregnant –Maimuna Abaji
By AZUH AMATUS
Tuesday, March
22, 2005
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•Maimuna Abaji
Photos: Sun News Publishing
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Bold, intelligent and daring leading actress-cum-television
presenter, Maimuna Yahaya (nee Abaji), shot to national fame
some couple of years ago when she thrilled and tantalized
millions of Nigerians on television with her role of Emotan,
in rested soap, After The Storm.
From Idah in Kogi State, pretty and ever-bubbly Maimuna, is
now happily married to a naval officer.
The holy wedlock that was contracted in 2000 is blessed with
a baby boy named David.
The multi-talented star of "Heart Beat, February 14"
and many other hit movies and television soaps says: "Prior
to meeting my husband, I never liked and even vowed never
to marry a uniformed man, especially those in the Armed Forces."
In this interview with Daily Sun, the Theatre Arts graduate
of University of Jos, goes down memory lane. She also spoke
about her wave-making family and marriage-oriented programme
on television, called BOND. On Nigerian men, she further says:
"They even chased me with a nine months pregnancy…despite
being married, they still disturb me much"
You have a new programme on television called BOND. What is
it all about?
BOND is a programme that talks extensively about challenges
within the family unit. We also talk about issues that bother
individuals in their homes, so that people who are about getting
married or those who are in marriage already can learn a lesson
or two from it. We have come to realize that many marriages
have problems. As a married woman, I also have my own little
problems; we also look at ways of forging ahead in order to
solve our marital problems so that divorce cases can be avoided.
It does not help when you are married and later divorced with
children to show for the collapsed marriage. It makes the
children vulnerable to many ills in the society. We are contributing
in our own little ways towards making better marriages.
When was BOND started?
Funny enough, BOND is almost two years now. It debuted on
June 14, 2003 on NTA 2,channel 5, Lagos. Presently, we are
on stations like KSTV, RSTV and PRTV. We are also working
on how to take the programme to SilverBird TV. I’m also
trying to take the programme to my state, that is Kogi TV,
so that my people can see for themselves the good work their
daughter is doing. In fact, with BOND, I’m spreading
my tentacles.
What inspired BOND?
Emmh! Many things really inspired it. First, as a child growing
up, I had a big phobia for marriage. Then, I had the impression
that marriage is an imprisonment. Also, as a child, I had
no patience to follow many things up. I could start things
and with a little pressure I would give it up. I now said
that if truly I want to be married and stay permanently in
marriage, then I had to work hard knowing all about marriage
and how to keep a home. So, I started researching into marriages
by talking to married couples. It was after all these that
I decided to come up with a marriage-oriented programme. Another
thing is that many young girls usually think that by getting
married, their entire problems would be solved. Marriage is
not an end to problems but a stepping-stone into life. So,
we must learn how to live the life in a marriage situation.
So, you have abandoned acting for television presentation
now?
No! No!! No!!! I’m still into full-time acting. Let
me also say that I’m not a marriage counsellor, I only
talk to people on marital issues. Even as a spinster, I was
also talking to married couples on how to make their marriages
work. Mine is natural, it also came with many readings. I’ve
read many books on marriages and counselling. I also try to
practicalise some of these things.
With your experience so far, what would you say is the biggest
problem facing marriages in Nigeria today?
Three things I would say. One is infidelity, followed by lack
of trust and lastly the bad economy. When there is no money,
many things go wrong in a family. You can’t be happy
in a family when you can’t afford to eat the next meal.
So, if somebody nextdoor gives you the next meal when your
husband or wife can’t do it and it continues like that,
one day you will surely pay the price…Also, as human
beings, we are insatiable, we keep wanting. The need to have
more also leads most marriages into trouble. Even the society
itself does not help matters, it allows a man to do and undo.
The men feel like they are lords, they also grew up not knowing
how to show emotions. They always feel because they are men,
they are always right. The fact also that they are allowed
to sleep around and at the end of the day expect their wives
at homes to be faithful has led to the collapse of many homes.
They said you stopped acting because of marriage. How true
is this?
Never. I can’t do without acting. It gives me much joy.
Remember I started acting from my days as an undergraduate
in Unijos in 1991. I started then with a soap opera in Jos.
It was called SHADOWS. But my first movie was entitled HEARTBEAT;
Chico Ejiro shot it in ’95. Sincerely speaking, marriage
has nothing to do with my not being frequent in movies these
days. I’m lucky to have a husband who encourages me
to do whatever he thinks makes me happy. He encourages me
to act because he knows I’m usually happy whenever I’m
on set. My only problem with acting these days is the problem
they put actresses through. The inhuman treatments they mete
out to us are what I’m not comfortable with. Inhuman
treatment, in the sense that they abandon people in scorching
sun in the pretext of doing auditions and castings most times,
I also see them locking up and keeping artistes outside the
gates of their offices for hours under the rain or in the
sun. All these put me of.
Have you done some acting jobs recently?
Yes! A lot. I’ve been busy lately working with Wale
Adenuga, on his Super Story set. I was on set with them some
three months ago on the sets of Binta My Daughter and Dear
Mother. The last movie I did came out early this year, it
was entitled February 14, Paul Obazele directed it. More of
my jobs will come out this year. I’ve been busy combining
acting with TV presentation.
You came to national prominence with your role as Emotan,
in rested network soap entitled After The Storm. Since then
not much has been heard about you in terms of TV soaps. Did
you quit?
(Cuts in), I did not quit. NTA could not come to terms with
sponsorship for After The Storm then. So, we all went our
different ways when it was rested. And afterwards, I started
doing other things on television. During this period I did
Jaded Options for Patrick Doyle on television. Right now,
I’m also working on a soap for myself. I intend to start
shooting from June, this year. No title yet, but it is going
to be a family-oriented soap. When I’m set, we would
pick all the topics we had treated on BOND before and dramatise
them. It would be like every episode, one topic.
Sometimes last year, you planned producing a movie, but till
date nothing has been done. Any problem?
No problem at all. I put the project on hold because of how
volatile the industry was throughout last year. I will go
back on set for the movie later this year. But I’m starting
with the soap first.
At what age did you get married?
I got married in 2000 at the age of 27. And there is a baby
boy named David to show for the marriage. My husband is a
naval officer.
So, what got you attracted to a military man?
(Laughs). My marriage to a naval officer was not by design.
I never in my life wanted to have anything to do with a uniformed
person, especially those in the Armed Forces. But his kind
of person got me attracted, if you see him, you would like
him. He is a good-looking young man. I see myself as a too
serious person, and whenever he comes around me then, I find
reasons to laugh and smile. He was and is still there for
me. Do you know that he edits my BOND for me every weekend
at home? Though, he is an engineer, he went the extra mile
to learn how to edit programmes because of me. Tell me, aint
I lucky? (Laughs). He gives me much support: I wonder what
I would have done without him.
What really got you tripped about him?
First, his physical being got me tripped. I’ve always
told myself I was not going to give birth to ugly children.
Because I know one day it would get to a stage where kids
would ask their parents to explain to them why they look so
ugly in the midst of their pals and colleagues. So, deep down
I said to myself that I would marry a tall and good-looking
man. He appealed to me much. Prior to marrying him, I vowed
never to marry from my village, town or state. And he is from
my place. Even before meeting him, I never liked dark people
for relationships, but he is dark. The so many good things
in him outweighed all these things he had which I never liked
before meeting him.
As at the time you met your husband, was marriage on your
mind?
Not really. Then that I met him marriage was not on my mind.
We started talking marriage after being good pals for 90 days.
As a married woman, can you still play romantic roles in movies?
I don’t particularly see anything wrong in playing romantic
roles on set. I love kissing in real life, but can’t
do it in movies. But if a script that has romantic scenes
comes my way, I will definitely give it a trial in a professional
way, remember I read Theatre Arts.
As a child growing up, was Theatre Arts what you actually
dreamt of studying?
No! I had dreamt of reading law as a child then. Maybe, I
would go back to the university to study it soon. Also, as
a child, I dreamt of being famous and wealthy…but my
passion for acting made me go read Theatre Arts. Funny enough,
I got into University of Jos, as a law student but changed
to Theatre Arts after a semester.
As somebody from a strict Muslim home, were your parents in
support of you going into acting?
Not really! They were just indifferent about the whole thing.
My father only warned me about bleaching or changing the colour
of my skin later in life. He said many people he sees on television
do that.
If tomorrow your hubby tells you to quit acting, would you?
I don’t see him asking me to do that. But if he does,
I will quit.
As a married star actress, do men still chase you?
Yes! They chase me knowing full well I’m married. One
of these randy men even had the guts to ask me out when I
was nine months pregnant and waiting to deliver my son. In
fact, this man even had the guts to tell me he would wait
for me to deliver so that we can kick off the affair. I’m
no longer bothered or surprised, because I have come to terms
that men will always be men.
Which satisfies you more between acting and television presenting?
I prefer acting anyday, anytime. But the TV presentation brings
more money. If I were not into showbiz today, I would have
been a successful lawyer.
What do you see as the biggest problem facing independent
TV presenters in Nigeria today?
Finance and sponsorships are our biggest problems. The TV
stations contribute much to our problems. They increase airtime
rates indiscriminately and even yank off your programmes randomly
without informing you. All these are really frustrating.
Has marriage denied you anything?
(Thinks). Nothing! The only thing I don’t like about
marriage is the anxiety that comes with it. You are constantly
worried for another person. Many headaches.
What is the greatest lesson you have learnt from being married?
It is patience. I never used to be patient prior to marriage.
What are the things you would like to be remembered for when
you quit the stage?
My good works. I want to leave an indelible mark. I want to
contribute to people’s lives. I don’t want to
die and be forgotten, I want to be remembered and talked about
even in death.
If given the chance, what would you want to do for humanity?
A lot! I want to help indigent students with a foundation
or scholarship schemes. I also want to help build a better
society and help fight the scourge of poverty and diseases.
You got married at 27, do you sometimes regret the fact that
you married at that age?
No! I only regret the fact that I’m being made to space
my children. I would have loved to have three kids in three
years. So, I want three kids but my husband wants two. So,
we are yet to reach a compromise on that. Lastly, marriage
has been so sweet to me. No regrets at-all.
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