Why I love her? She is robust, full bodied. Every man wants a full-bodied, young and fresh woman
From KENNY ASHAKA, Kaduna
Tuesday, February 12, 2008

•Mr and Mrs Dogo Photo: Sun News Publishing

Romance Index

It was not love at first sight that brought Safiya, daughter of the Registrar of Kaduna Polytechnic, Mr. Zailani Butswat to the altar with Harling Meller Dogo in holy matrimony. Their toast during the wedding, "love isn’t about finding the right person but creating a right relationship through Christ that last for eternity," says it all.

For Safiya and Harling, it is thanks to the organisers of "Youths with a Purpose," a Christian programme with youths as its focus that provided the platform the spark that caught the couple and brought them to Kentengkereng-Billiri, Gombe State where the nuptial knot was tied. Harling attends a Pentecostal Church in Kaduna and Safiya was brought up an ECWA Christian.

However, Safiya vowed to Daily Sun that "although I was brought up an ECWA Christian, I am going to join his church … because his people will be my people; his God, my God and his church will be my church."

Safiya Meller
How we met
Somebody wrote a letter to me and gave a friend of his to deliver it in Kaduna. The friend came to my house; but didn’t meet me. So, he dropped a note describing the house. I located the house and got the letter he brought from Gombe. That’s where I met him. He is the owner of the house but the friend of his who brought the letter stays with him. When we met, there was nothing. It was after a year when we met again that we exchanged numbers. We started dating in 2005. We were just friends until January last year when he asked me to marry him.

How he proposed
I was shocked at first because I was surprised. He went to Gombe and on his way back to Bauchi, he came and said he wanted to marry me. So it was surprising. I thought he was joking. So, when he left and arrived his destination, he called me again and was insisting that I should give him a reply. He said he was serious. I asked him to give me sometime. After sometime, I now replied him that I am ready.

Attraction
He is a very open person and he is serious about everything. He is also a determined and charming personality.

Parents reaction
He attends a pentecostal church and I know my father is not too down with pentecostal churches. So when I told him, he (my husband) attends a pentecostal church, it was like ‘Oh, is he not from ECWA Church?’ It was like Kai. Later he said Okay. If it’s your choice and God’s will, we will just pray and ask God for an answer. But my mother and siblings were Okay with it. I called my elder sister and she told my father. Then when we held our family meeting, I told him. Then myself and my husband also told him.

Harling Meller (husband)
How we met
It all started when she came to my house to get a message from my friends younger brother who was in the UK then. When I came back to the house, I saw her. We greeted and we parted. There was nothing. After a year, we met at an occasion, one church programme called Youths With A Purpose (YWAP). It was like… how are you doing; how is everything. So, you are around? Yes. We now exchanged numbers. From then, we started making calls. I will call her; she will call me. Then after sometimes again we met and talked. But there was nothing connecting the two of us because she had her relationship and I was into relationship. So, we both had our relationships. But somehow as fate would have it, we met again. Today, I find myself a married man.

Attraction
Like the night we met at the YWAP programme, she was looking different from the lady I met the first time. She was robust, full bodied. Of course, every man wants a full-bodied woman, young and fresh. So, we talked. From her speeches, I could sense some intelligence. Quite alright, she is an intelligent lady.

Parents consent
We did our thing independently. We only appeared and showed our parents our interests. We just told them that we want to get married. My parents didn’t argue about it because they know the kind of person I am. Her parents didn’t argue about it because they know their daughter. And for the few times I went to their house, they know the kind of person I am. I am an Associate Pastor with the House of Rock Church, Kaduna.

For me to be an Associate Pastor in the church there must be some degree of trust. They are good Christians. They are understanding and they believed that a young man like me, being a Pastor would have a good relationship with God. So, there was no opposition.