•Mrs Abimbola Olawuyi Photo: Sun News Publishing

Woman of the Sun Index

It was a cool Thursday morning and you walk into Kolbim’s Communications Office, Ikeja, Lagos, to keep an appointment with the late Kola Olawuyi’s wife. There she was; Deaconess Taiwo Abimbola Olawuyi on her feet, beaming a toothy smile, her hands wide open ready to hug you.

She hugged you warmly, thanking and praying for you and The Sun’s Newspaper for the publicity during her husband’s demise last year March.

Dressed in a sky blue and black skirt and blouse ankara, Olawuyi spoke with you at length on how she met her husband, his ideology, the support she’s getting from his family, what she would miss about him and the vacuum his exit created. The interview below:

"I want to give glory to God, it has not been an easy road, ordinarily, it wasn’t something that I was prepared for. Even in the next 10 years, I didn’t expect it. But the Bible says that in all things, that we should give thanks. It’s not been too easy to be devoid of emotion but I still want to thank God. We both shared the same office, our itinerary was so interwoven.

We leave home together, be in the office together, go home together. For me now to wake up and come to the office all alone, get to the office without seeing him. Most times, I will lock my office door and weep and say, ‘God! Why me? But then, I will still brace up because I have to keep his legacy, be strong for the children, who are so young. I cannot afford to break down, and God is helping me that the programmes, ‘Nkan nbe’ and ‘Irinkerindo’ are still on air.
"There’s no day that passes that I don’t remember him. And that is why I decided to hang his pictures all around the office and home. Some people asked me why I did that, I want to continue to look at him, even mere looking at the children, I know my husband is always there. By and large, I want to give glory to God.

"So many things that I would miss about him. My husband was unique. I would miss his jokes, I miss preparing his favourite meal of amala and ewedu. When he was alive, he used to call me ‘Taiwo’, even my children when growing up called me Taiwo, until they are older now. He called me Taiwo until he breathed his last. Now, there is no one to cook for, when he was alive, no matter how tired I was, I would still prepare his meal but now, I go to bed and prepare something light for myself, at other times, I go to bed without dinner. Besides preparing stew for my children during the weekend and giving instructions now, the energy to go to kitchen is no longer there. But that is not to say that I don’t cook, because naturally I love cooking but his death…

"He was my senior in secondary school, but we were not on talking terms. I can’t even remember if we talked for once in school. He was a year ahead of me. And we met several years after in Ibadan. I called him Kola on sighting him, later he told me that, when I called him Kola, he was like, ‘why now? After all he was my senior in school. But then, it was years after and I didn’t see anything wrong in calling him by his name, and even while in school, I wasn’t close to him to call him ‘senior Kola’. We actually started from that platform, by then, he was working at Radio Nigeria. We started talking, even then it never crossed my mind that I would be his wife. Gradually, the story changed and we got married on February 12, 1994.

"I want to believe God that this outfit is a ministry that He gave to my husband. The Bible makes me to realize that husband and wife are one, it is a ministry God gave to us. God is with us, I am assured that He would sustain the programmes irrespective of the storm. To His glory, in commemorating his one year, we are spreading our tentacles to other parts of the country. Now, we have started our programmes on Ekiti State T.V., Ekiti Radio, Osun State T.V. and radio, Radio Kwara, NTA Ogbomoso and shortly Akure. I want to believe God that as far as He would take us, He would sustain us. We have new sponsors now and that is the Lord’s doing."

"Actually, he was in the office a week before his death. I left him in the office to quickly get something in the market. Eventually when I returned, he wasn’t in the office. And he didn’t call me to tell me that he would be going home or somewhere. I didn’t want to ask any of the staff, I decided to go home and met him sleeping. Later, I woke him to eat his meal and he slept again.

"On Saturday morning, he told me what happened at the office when I left. I went downstairs to cook his meal, and he ate. He ate his breakfast, lunch and even dinner. I felt his temperature, it was slightly high. I asked him what the matter was, he said there was nothing. Later on, I came upstairs and he was still lying down, felt his temperature again, there was no improvement. I decided to call the doctor. The doctor came in and told us that it was malaria symptoms and gave us some drugs, which I administered on him. On Sunday, we left him to go to church, the only thing that I noticed was that he was not talking much. I was worried and kept asking him, why he was not talking and when probing was much, he asked me, ‘what is it to talk about?’

That Sunday morning, I gave him his breakfast, he said that I should prepare another meal for him. I did as he asked me and put it in cooler but he asked me to remove it. I told him that it would be cold when he decides to eat it. He insisted and told me that he wanted to eat it now. He ate it and left small portion, which he asked me to cover for him. We left for church, leaving him at home, by the time, we returned, he had eaten the remaining food.

"He was not talking much and kept shaking his head. On Monday morning, I gave him, his food, he didn’t eat it well compared to the weekend. Even that Sunday night, I called the children so that we could pray for daddy. We surrounded him on the bed, prayed, jumped, just to do certain things to amuse him. He just winked at me and smiled. Then, Monday morning, the kids left for school, he was still lying on the bed. He was not talking and I kept pestering him to talk to me and he asked me, ‘what is there to talk about? And eventually, my pastor, Pastor Adesan came in, when he saw him, he insisted that we must call the doctor again. We called the doctor again, actually he (doctor) came on Sunday night to check him.

"When he came, he advised us to bring him to the hospital, I resisted because I felt it was just malaria and that he would get over it. But we took him to the hospital and he died on Friday evening. I was there when he died, he looked at me and breathed his last. One of his friends, Mike Eborah was with me when it happened. When we got there, I met the doctor and some nurses in his room, I asked what the problem was, and I was told that his breathing was rapid. I was there and calling my brother on phone, who is also a doctor, and he asked me to give the phone to our doctor, so that he could ask professional questions.

"They were still talking when he breathed his last. I asked what happened, the doctor couldn’t talk. He was moved to tears and I asked him, ‘won’t my husband talk again?’ He shook his head. I broke down. But I believe that God decided to take him away and no one could stop Him. I rest my case with God. I give him all the glory that he went to be with the Lord.

‘Simisola, my last baby told me that my pastor told them then, that their daddy has gone to meet with Jesus. That it is better for him to be with Jesus than to be on a sick bed. I want to credit my pastor for doing a good job. Even now, Simisola would innocently tell me, ‘I would go and report you to my daddy, I wish my daddy is here, so that I am able to tell him everything’. As much as possible, I don’t want to break down in their presence, so that sorrow won’t overwhelm them. I will remain strong for them.

"Ironically, last year February 12 was our wedding anniversary, I didn’t even remember because he was a bit down that day. When I eventually remembered through my niece, who sent a text around 6a.m, I then asked him what the date was. He told me ‘February 12’, then I asked him what happened on February 12, then he shouted, ‘oh Taiwo! I’m sorry… ah our wedding anniversary, then I was like, so something could happen, and I won’t remember our wedding anniversary. Naturally, I would have remembered, it was very close to Valentine’s day.

"I never knew that February 12, 2007 was going to be the last wedding anniversary together. It was when he died that I got to realize that several wedding anniversaries would come without him.
"Re-marry? I am not so young. I am above 40. In the real sense of it, there is no reason for me to remarry, what would I be looking for? To the glory of God, I have four wonderful children, a girl and three boys. I don’t need any companionship, my kids are there to be my companions. I have lots of work to occupy me.

Temptation? An idle hand is the devil’s workshop, when he was alive, he used to complain that my church activities were affecting certain things, both at home and in the office. Honestly speaking, I am so occupied. I don’t even have time for myself. Now, talking about temptation, the Bible says, ‘Resist the devil and he will flee away from you.’ I have more than enough to occupy me. My spotting a low cut now is in his memory, to respect him, no one asked me to do it. It is just a mark of honour for my late husband.

"Even the CD, titled ‘A koni ki ku’ a tribute to him, is produced in his memory and for the next generation, who may not know him. Through the documentary, they would know that someone called Kolawole Olawuyi came, was a voice of the voiceless to many during his time."