| WAITING TO DIE
By Jossy Idam (Jidam14@yahoo.com)
Saturday,
August 26, 2006
 |
•Esther
and Menasi
Photo: Sun News Publishing |
| |
With life slowly ebbing out of her Ebony body, a widow dying
of AIDS in Jos, the Plateau State capital, wants nothing anymore
except that the Federal Government allows two of her children
to be adopted by an eager American couple.
Speaking with difficulty and sobbing, she said: “I know
I may soon die. Let them go outside the country. If they grow,
they will remember their brothers and sisters and their country.
This is my last wish”.
The 35-year-old widow was born Esther Bature at Miango, in
Bassa local government area, Plateau State. She stopped going
to school at Primary Six. She even sat for Common Entrance
Examination and passed. But when she needed parental guidance,
her parent’s marriage hit the rocks. She was simply
left at her own devices. Her father and mother tosed her around
until she got a little older and began fending for herself
the best way she could.
Unlucky in love and marriage
Before meeting Humphrey, the man whom she claims to have been
really married to, she had lived –in with other men-
Idia from Akwa Ibom State, Bala from Nasarrawa State, Moses
from Kaduna State, and Danlami from Jos Plateau. Humphery,
the only one she has an emotional attachment to, is from Rivers
State. Saturday Sun learnt he died of HIV/AID’S related
diseases. Her fifth male consort even impregnated her and
denied being responsible for the baby. The man wrote and told
welfare officers in Jos he would forever have nothing to do
with Esther and her baby, Menasi.
Esther’s men
She met and began living with Idia Ekpu Afia in the 80s. On
November 2, 1989, she delivered her first baby, a boy, James
Idia, she revealed, is from Akwa Ibom. The man, according
to her travelled but never returned. Esther strongly feels
he might have died in a motor accident. Next came Bala Mohammed.
On September 22, 1991, Esther delivered a baby girl, Halima
for him. But the relationship crashed and they went separate
ways in 1993. Bala is from Nasarawa State and still alive.
Moses Waziri, a Kaduna State indigene came next. On October
17, 1994, the brief union produced Victor. But Esther soon
discovered he had another wife, and so, dumped him.
When she had Blessing in December 1998 and Daniel two years
later for Humphrey Alerechi, she thought she could settle
down with him forever. But the man passed on in 2003, courtesy
of HIV/AIDS. He was from Omumkpu Omute Omuanwa, Rivers State.
Scraping out a living
Saddle with the responsibility of raising six children and
a mother who has been diagnosed of HIV/AIDS, two unemployed,
single-parent younger sisters, Esther began petty trading
to make ends meet.
She and her large household all the while lived in a hard
squalid ghetto called Utan village, a squalid suburb in the
outskirts of Jos. In the place noted for notorious easy living,
unbriddled consumption of alcohol and cheap sex, Esther found
a two-room make –shift shelter.
Describing the place, Esther said: “People do nothing
other than drink and prostitute in the open at night. You
see young children in dark corners. This is not the kind of
life I want for my children”.
Cry for help
As though her economic deprivation was not enough, Esther
in 2001 was diagnosed of HIV. A kind-hearted person later
told her of an outreach programme, Women of Hope, which is
being run by Mashiah Foundation, a Christian Ministry with
a social welfare programmes for the ailment HIV/positive widows
and their children. The organisation registerd her and began
giving her drugs free of charge. “They accepted me and
have been treating me, giving me free drugs and providing
for my upkeep. Without Mashiah Foundation, I am sure I would
have died since. They rented a shop for me and gave me money
with which I now buy and sell household provisions. They gave
me hope”, she said.
Rescue
Depressed by her condition, Esther one day summoned up courage
and went to the co-founder and international coordinator of
Mashiah Foundation, Bayo Oyebode and told him to help and
adopt her last three children. She told him she knows she
won’t last long and therefore wants to adopt out of
the children.
Logjam
Bayo and his wife, Marybeth, an American, sent words across
some churches in the U.S.A. Two families promptly responded.
One wished to adopt Esther’s last baby, Menasi. Another,
David and Sara Hampe wished to adopt two others, Blessing
Humphery, 8, and Daniel Humphrey, 6. Glad with the interest
and response by the intending surogate parents, Mashiah Foundation
formally approached the Social Welfare department in Jos.
After preliminary discussions with the department, the foundation
was referred to the Social Welfare Department in Abuja.
Underterred, Bayo went on and applied to adopt the children
on behalf of one of the couples. He even linked the social
welfare with the interested couple. One of the couples who
had earlier shown interest to adopt Menasi, Esther’s
last baby perhaps lost interest because of the endless rigmarole.
But David and Sara Hampe remained resolute in their desire
to adopt the children.
After a while, Mashiah Foundation was referred to the Federal
Ministry of Women Affairs. On January 14, 2005, the organisation
applied directly to the Minister of Women Affairs and Youth
Development. Four months later, the Minister replied, in a
letter dated 18th April, 2005. A staff of the ministry, Mrs.
N.O. Jipreze, who signed the letter on behalf of the minister
said: “I am, however, to inform you that the Child Rights
Acts, 2003 prohibits international adoption. Therefore, it
would not be possible to allow for the adoption of these children
by David and Sara Hampe of Iowa”. Concluding, she promised
that “The ministry would take up the case of these two
children through the Orphans and Vulnerable Children Unit
of the ministry”.
Endless wait
A year and five months after, nothing has been heard again
from the ministry. Obviously disappointed with the way the
government is toying with the fate of vulneable children like
Blessing and Daniel, Bayo said: “For a country of over
100 million people, with about one million existing as orphans,
why should we insist on implementation of this kind of law.
It is the same country where people take their pregnant wives
outside the country for delivery to ensure that their children
obtain the status of citizens of that foreign country where
they were given birth to. I would like the government to throughly
re-exam the law and differentiate between child trafficking,
slavery and proper adoption”.
Dreadful penalty
Going by the Child Rights Act 2003, it is a criminal offence
for Nigerian children to be adopted by foreigners and outside
Nigeria. Subsection 2 of the Act states: “a person who
permits or causes or procures the possession of a child to
be given to any person outside Nigeria with intent to getting
that child fostered by that person commits an offence. The
penalty is an imprisonment for a term of 15 years.”
Legibility and clearance
As the adoption preocess of Blessing and Daniel lingers, the
licensed child placing agency in lowa, Family Connections,
has rigorously studied, interviewed, and found David and his
wife, Sara elegible to adopt the two Nigerian children.
According to records made available to the ministry of Women
Affairs, David Hampe has a Bachelor of Arts degree with a
major in Criminology. He works with the U.S Army National
Guard as a training officer. His wife, Sara, majored in Elementary
Education. She is, therefore a school teacher. David earns
40,800 dollars annually while Sara earns 6,000 dollars. The
couple’s salary is enough to support and care for Blessing
and Daniel.
Motive
The couple’s motive for wanting to adopt Blessing and
Daniel is purely based on charity and conviction that anyone
who has had the harrowing experience like that of Blessing
and Daniel “will grow in a positive manner”.
Touched heart
Touched by the plight of thousands of vulnerable Nigerian
children like Blessing and Daniel, a member of the House of
Representatives, Hon. Chinonyerem Macebu has sponsored a bill
to ammend the 2003 Child Rights Act.
The bill seeks to make it possible for qualified foreigners
whether resident in Nigeria or not to be eligible to adopt
Nigerian children. Before approval would be granted, the applicant
must show prove of no criminal record and means of supporting
the child. The applicant must also be properly briefed on
the United Nations convention on the welfare of the child.
David and Sara have three teenage children of their own. Saturday
Sun learnt they recently bought a new storey building and
furnished it in readiness for the arrival of Blessing and
Daniel.
While emphasing total welfare and education of the child,
the bill clearly declares that where the welfare of any adopted
Nigerian child is compromised, an apropriate diplomatic response
by Nigeria and the United Nations would prevail.
To deeply know Blessing and her younger brother, Daniel, Saturday
Sun learnt that David and Sara will be in Nigeria soon. They
are earger to know Nigerian culture, cuisine and the real
background of the children they already consider as theirs.
How she got HIV/AIDS
It is not clear how Esther got the dreaded disease, AIDS,
she doesn’t even know how she got it. But the questions
whipping the mind are: Did any of her five husbands, Humphrey
especially, who is alleged to have died of HIV/AIDS infect
her with the virus? Or did she or any of her partners at any
time use a contaminated product?
Before she went to Mashiah Foundation for help, Esther barely
managed to stay alive without proper medication and nutritious
food. Now she is one of the 50 HIV positive widows currently
undergoing vocational training at Mashiah Foundations Project,Women
of Hope in Jos. She and others are being taught how to make
quilt bedsheets and so on.
The HIV positive widows, in addition, receive free medication
from the NGO, shelter and free education for their children.
Looking back, Esther told Saturday Sun that she wasn’t
actually married to any of her five “husbands”.
“We were friends and lived together”, she said.
When Esther’s parents broke up, their marriage, her
father Bature Angulu remarried but had no extra children except
the four he had with Esther’s mother, Talatu. But not
same for Talatu, who also remarried and had six more children
for her new husband. Until he became ill with tuberculosis,
Esther’s father, Bature worked as a securityman at a
school in Jos. Now he is sick and jobless. Worst for Esther
still, her mother Talatu recently tested HIV positive also.
Esther and the NGO are now saddled with the responsibility
of taking care of her.
Describing how HIV/AIDS is ravaging her body, Esther says:
sometimes, you will notice itching and rashes, headache, fever,
cough, diarrhoea and dysentery. It’s very painful”.
Her Children’s HIV status
Though the father of Blessing and Daniel, Humphery died of
HIV/AIDS, none of Esther’s six children has tested positive.
The NGO taking care of the children and their widowed mother,
Mashiah Foundation has run tests on them and certified them
“clean”. Out of her five husbands, only Humphery
Alerechi is known to have died of HIV/AIDS. The disease killed
him in 2003. Her last “husband” and father of
her sixth baby, Menasi even issued what can be regarded as
a disclaimer to the Plateau state social welfare department.
The statement in part reads: “I promise never to have
any thing to do with the child in future”.
The boy, Menasi was only seven weeks old when his presumed
biological father absolved himself of being responsible for
his birth and left without a trace. Attempts by the state’s
social welfare officers to persuade the man to own up failed.
He simply closed his heart, turned his back on Menasi and
his mother, Esther. If his mother dies without the government’s
approval for the adoption of Blessing, Daniel and him, they
will become a figure in the statistics of the nation’s
ever-increasing AIDS orphans. Saturday Sun learnt that the
American couple who wants to adopt him say they don’t
mind if the sweet, chubby-faced Menasi is positive. He is
now a year and three months old. |
