If you are a woman with a means of livelihood, desperate for a biological child or children and you are still single at age 35 and above, go and get pregnant.
Visit a sperm bank or get a man to get you pregnant. This is if you are desperate to be the biological mother of your child. But if you want to hold on till you are married, it’s all good.
There are always openings for adoption and surrogacy should you cross the child bearing age while waiting to get married or if getting pregnant becomes life threatening or near impossible.
Don’t let society or religion limit your choices or decide what’s best for you when different options abound that will solve your case. Choose one or all the options available and smile at last.
If you are single in your mid or late 30s and you are open to polygamy, you don’t mind becoming a second or third wife just to be a Mrs., because being a single parent or baby mama doesn’t cut it for you, it is good as well.
I’m not in the best position to advice ladies whose minds are made up on polygamy, but there’s a catch though, never settle to share same apartment with the other wife.
This is for your peace of mind and safety. Get your own place or insist he provides a different accommodation far from the other wife’s place.
Don’t ever try to compete with his other wife under any guise. If he comfortably married you as wife number 2 or 3 don’t fight him, act jealous or become depressed if he decides to take another wife.
By all means, make your own money. Have your own money and buy properties in your own chil- dren’s name. Don’t marry him and start dragging properties with the first wife and her children; it doesn’t matter if he is still alive or dead.
All you wanted was to become a wife so it is best that you strive harder to give your own children a better life with or without your husband’s properties.
If you are married and unable to conceive, bear a child or more children, adoption, surrogacy and assisted conception such as In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) are very good options. Discuss these options with your husband and encourage him to see a doctor as well, to be certain he has no fertility issues.
If IVF fails repeatedly or you stand the risk of losing your life if you get pregnant, go for surrogacy or adoption. Do not kill yourself because you want to carry your child in your own womb. Nature has given you options, use them wisely.
If you are pregnant, register for anti-natal immediately and heed to your doctor’s advice to keep you and your baby safe. Do not substitute your medication with prayers.
When it’s time to give birth to your child, head straight to the hospital not your church. Your church is not the labour room neither is your pastor a doctor or a midwife.
Do not be a foolish Christian who insists on giving birth like the proverbial ‘Hebrew women.’ There are many needless deaths and un- due complications that take place on account of birthing like the ‘He- brew women.’ Many have actually committed suicide just to be like the Hebrew women.
If the scan result says your baby is breeched, follow professional advice. When mother and child are alive and safe, that’s the real definition of delivering like the Hebrew women.
To all the women who shame women who undergo assisted conception (i.e. IVF), Caesarean Section delivery, adoption, surro- gacy and more, you are ignorant and plain stupid. You should desist from such hence forth.
The problem with most religious people today is that they cannot differentiate between wishful thinking and faith. Even the holy books said the sick need a physician. It is not a sin, crime or some-thing to be ashamed of to deliver a child through Caesarean Section.
Vaginal birth does not make you a stronger woman, neither does getting pregnant through IVF make the babies any less human. Don’t be overly religious and foolish. Medical science is not competing with your religion; it is actually a miracle if it works for you and proof of your answered prayers.
As a woman, your self esteem is important. You don’t have to prove anything to anybody. Explore every God given options with your head held up high.
If you tested positive to HIV, do not refuse to take your medication and resort to prayers only. Do not be unfortunate this new year.
If you have fibroids, don’t refuse surgery to have them removed. There nothing wrong with having fibroids, it is something that comes with age. Quit living in denial that it is not fibroid and even if it is, your God will change it to a baby and you will deliver safely.
Such religious fanaticism has made many people refuse to seek further medical help while they fast, pray and even drink anointing oil every day while suffering from medical ailments.
2020 is not a year for foolishness, it is the year to get busy, to not remain in any form of abusive relationship for fear of what people or religion would say.
It is a year to work hard, pray hard, make more money and not remain at the mercy of any human.