Chiedu Uche Okoye
Dear mother, how are you? I pray that you are healthy. And, I pray that God will continue to bless you with robust health as you age gracefully. Although you know that I possess scribal abilities, writing skills, and penchant and love for writing, you’ll be taken aback when you receive this missive as the art of letter-writing has become passé. Mom, the forthcoming St Valentine’s Day, which falls on February 14, 2020, necessitated my writing this letter to you. I want you to keep the letter as a keepsake. And, in future, it will serve as your spacecraft for voyage into the past.
But, what is Valentine’s Day? It is a day people demonstrate their love for their spouses, relatives, friends, and parents through diverse means. It is a yearly event, which is marked by peoples of the world, who have different religious beliefs, cultural practices, political ideologies, and racial backgrounds. Today, many legends have been woven around Valentine. And its true origins may have been lost in the mist of times. The origin of valentine is important; however, I’ll not dwell on it here.
I am as much concerned about its origin as I am interested in mapping out and delineating its significations. So, what does Valentine stands for? We know that it connotes and denotes love. The Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary defines love, to wit: “ Love is a strong feeling of deep affection for somebody or something, especially a member of your family or friend.” To me, “Love is when you do a favour or act of benefaction for a person, who is in dire circumstances without expecting that he or she will requite it.” The meanings of love are encompassing; and, its properties, include, but not limited to these, forgiveness, forbearance, and empathy. A person, who has the virtue of love, shows empathy to the less-privileged people. And, he engages in deeds to ameliorate their pitiable plight. More so, people who have the virtue of love do not bear malice against those who wronged them in the past.
I will not fail to say that it is from my mom that I learnt the true meaning of love. The filial bond which has existed between us is a classic demonstration of true love. I remember her working her fingers to the bones to earn money to augment her hubby’s income for the upkeep of our family, then. And, when death devastated our family, plucking her husband and two highly-gifted children, the lot of sponsoring me in the University fell on her. So, she sought financial support from her relatives to pay my school fees in the University. Again, she played a pivotal role in my securing my current job. So, now that she is in the winter of her years on earth, I’ve become her great support and help. I do accompany her to hospital for either periodic checkup or treatment. And, I will make witty remarks to humour her and make light her sufferings while she’s waiting for her turn to see the doctor. More so, people demonstrate their love for other people in many ways other than the filial bond, which exists between parents and their children. For example, Chief Michael Otedola, a philanthropist who is always actuated by feelings of love, sponsored the oversea treatment of Christian Chukwu, a football icon. But for his timely act of benefaction for Christian Chukwu, Mr. Chukwu would have died of that debilitating illness. What Chief Otedola did was a classic exemplification of love. There are other public-spirited Nigerians, who do help the less-privileged in our society. However, they are few and far between.
The fact is that love is a scarce commodity in today’s Nigeria. Millions of Nigerians do not have the virtue of love. They are hard- hearted misanthropists. It is paradoxical that overly religious Nigerians, who wear their religious beliefs on their sleeves, fight one another over issues bordering on religion and ethnic origins. Yet, the doctrinal base of every religion is love. It is sad and incredible that the qualitative education they had acquired in foreign schools and schools in Nigeria has not disabused their minds of ethnic prejudice and religious hatred. So, when sectarian violence erupts in the north, a hot- bed and epicenter of violence in Nigeria, Igbo people and their properties are targeted for destruction.
However, the dearth or non-existence of love among Nigerians manifests through other vile and sinister ways. It is not the feelings of love that motivate and actuate kidnappers, who abduct rich people for ransom. Sometimes, the kidnappers liquidated their victims after they had collected ransom. Kidnapping people for ransom and money-making rituals has become commonplace and normative in today’s Nigeria. It is another proof that a majority of Nigerians are unfeeling and hard-hearted human creatures. Again, the Boko Haram insurgents roam the large expanse of the north-east, stretching from Maiduguri to Yobe, and to Adamawa, killing Christians and Muslims alike in their crusade to install Islamic theocracy in Nigeria. Are the Boko Haram insurgents possessing the virtue of love? The answer is a categorical no. Their monstrous acts of devilry, barbarity, and homicide are not approved by the Koran. And we are not unconscious of the fact that Islam preaches love, although Muslim fundamentalists distort the teachings of Islam to justify their murderous deeds and bazaar of blood-letting.
Again, now, our political leaders, who perceive their occupation of exalted political posts as an open sesame to steal our collective money, are stealing Nigeria blind. Their larceny has caused the impoverishment of millions of Nigeria and infrastructural deficits in our country. Are those politicians possessing the virtue of love? While they live in opulence, millions of Nigerians starve and are reduced to sub humans. A political leader, who is filled with the virtue of love, will not divert public money into his or her private bank accounts. It is not only politicians, who are misanthropists. Across Nigeria, many families (the family is the basic unit of society) are disunited. Can parents bring up well-adjusted, responsible, and God-fearing children in a family that is suffused with hatred and violence? Now, marriages are collapsing like pack of cards because they are not founded on love and other family values. The worrisome aspect of those marital problems is that wives are hacking their hubbies to death. Maryann Sanda was recently convicted of murder for stabbing her hubby to death. People, who have the virtue of love, do not commit the crime of passion, no matter the provocation. They rein in their murderous emotions.
Now, in Nigeria, our non-possession of love is chipping away at our national unity, political stability, and cohesion. Because we do not have the virtue of love, people of an ethnic group are prejudiced against other people, whose ethnic origins are different from theirs.
So, in this season of I pray and commend my compatriots to imbibe the virtue of love. If we love one another, crime of passion will cease happening here, Boko Haram insurgents will sheathe their swords, and no political leader will purloin billions of naira earmarked for developmental projects.
Okoye writes from Uruowulu-Obosi Anambra State