Last week’s publication that some women are now replacing their husbands with sex toys elicited a lot of reactions, particularly from the men. It, therefore, became necessary that this week we try to offer possible solutions to this oil-rig evolution.
This piece will, therefore, try to provide clarifications to the sex toy syndrome as it has become a contemporary issue, again for the interest of men and women, particularly couples. Indeed, to accomplish sexual satisfaction most women go into all manners of immoralities on the excuse of not wanting to be identified as ‘unfaithful wife’ or get unwanted pregnancy. In the little minds of the perpetrators of this debauchery, who prove they are the ‘‘WhatsApp, Twitter, and Instagram” babes, the slogan among them are ‘we are having fun and getting sexually satisfied with the aid of a sex toy’. One tries to figure out the reason for the application of sex toys. According to Prof Aniefiok Umoiyoho, a Professor of Obstetrics and Gynaecology at the Uyo University Teaching Hospital, Uyo, Akwa Ibom State, study has showed that women who apply sex toy do so to run away from Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs). And they are done because of the unforeseen heartbreaks that come from men. A layman’s adage about sex toys says “whatever a man can do in bed, a sex toy can do safely better”. On the other hand, some Christians think that a sex toy is perfect to quench the urge of sexual feeling because it is not human, and the practice is, therefore, not a sin. Some other believers in their free thinking also believe that sex toys are accepted because at the point of orgasm, karma and destinies are exchanged either for good or bad; therefore, it is safer with the sex toys which would not harm any party during the game”.
Morally, women who complain that their husbands cannot give them sexual satisfaction due to weakness of his organ have not stood up to seek a lasting solution to the disease. Some of these sick ladies who go into this depravity will not claim they are innocent of the immorality they are committing with a sex toy because they know they cannot use it in the open. Let it not surprise many to hear that there are equally sex toys for the men because what is good for the goose is equally good for the gander. Women who cry of satisfaction should also know there are men who are served half-way too. What happens in a home where a husband buys his sex toy and the woman gets hers, couples engage in buying sex toys to satisfy themselves individually? How will that home be?
Interestingly, though sexual satisfaction is very important in marriage and relationships; but life does not start or end with it. There is more to life than meets the eye. When one’s mindset is set positively to achieve success and excellence; with good conduct, attitude, responsibility and focus, that dream could be achieved and surprisingly, one can see that weak, poor and non-performing man wake up and begin to wield much powers to surprise his woman. In my local parlance there is an adage that says, ‘aka kpa egbe, ya ekwuo…’ that is, ‘when a gun is touched, it blasts’.
Now, take it or leave it, ladies who have replaced their male partners with sex toys while looking for satisfaction, I challenge you to tell us, what you have done to support your husband in his low estate, what button have you pressed to get the final healing? Did non-sexual satisfaction come with the social media age? No, it did not. Didn’t Marvin Gaye, an American singer, songwriter, and record producer talk about it in his album sexual healing? How have you added value to his sex life? What is your attitude in the day time to expect satisfaction in the wee hours? When weak men summon courage to come near their women in their low and weak manor, are they encouraged the much they could or castigated to be completely flattened down and out in his pitiable situation because he has been replaced by a sex toy? Have you as a committed wife played your role to get your man wholly back to yourself? Have husbands become political parties who are dumped by wives who cross-carpeted to another party because her party is weak and not winning elections? Or are husbands new generation banks whose staffers resign because the bank has been declared ‘distressed’? Should a husband be replaced with a sex toy because a part of his body is sick? Women should not forget that whatever happens to his organ to cause dysfunction or poor sexual prowess could equally happen to another part of his body? Should that weak part not get medical attention to bounce back instead of being replaced with a sex toy? Are ladies willing to abide by the instructions from medicals in terms of drugs and diet?
Unfortunately, immorality is immorality no matter how it is looked at. A story was told of Emilia whose husband Andy relocated to Europe for greener pastures. The couple who hail from the South-south had agreed on the new chapter of life for the entire family to finally relocate abroad. Two years into her husband’s trip to the foreign land, Emilia was fingered as the chief lesbian who recruits young girls into such an atrocious act. It became her stock in trade, but it is said every day is for the thief, but one day is for the owner of the house. As an experienced immoral lesbian, there were frequent movement of young girls who flocked together in her home and her neighbours did not raise an eyebrow; not until her unmarried partner came and both threw caution to the wind not minding the presence of her under aged-children, they started off their stock in thread and dragged themselves to the room in an ajar position. Her children followed them in innocence and her son boldly asked. ‘Mummy what are you doing with Aunty Precious? It was tough for her because her children saw her in action with her partner. Emilia could not look at her children who drew the attention of their aunty, who was Emily’s older sister who tried to caution her irresponsible behaviour and also warned her partner not to visit the house again. Emilia picked on her big sister as she said: “I do not want to get pregnant since my husband does not reside here; but I need my sexual satisfaction because I am human and blood flows through my veins.”
In the same vein, a young Northern wife has carefully abandoned her aged husband who married her as his third wife to find solution with her sex object which her friends introduced to her. She plays with her toy once her husband goes to work. Unfortunately, it was her moaning while on motion one early morning when her husband tiptoed and caught her red-handed. That practice earned her serious inflicted injuries on her, but her action was too shameful to be discussed. Again, it is for sexual satisfaction that respected married women lose track of the marriage institution.
Dear Nigerian men, while we reason with you not to be replaced with sex toys; you need to be responsible, faithful and honest. Most women replaced their men with sex toys because of unfaithfulness, infidelity and betrayal.
While you are being pitied, pity and respect yourself. There is nothing that is too much, yet everything is too much.
Above all, make up your mind and live a life of one man, one woman, though it sounds a bit difficult for African men!