Esther rushed out of the room, screaming at the top of her voice, ‘Is sex food? Her husband Nick peeped to see if anyone was listening to his crazy wife and then walked in gently. Esther is not alone in this saga as many other women had tried to protest their husband’s regular demands for sex.
In recent times women, and even some men, have been asking the same question, specially when they feel their spouses are making unending demand for a roll on the sheets. Women caught in the grip of the insatiable craving of their husbands for more sex are more than likely to lament over the situation as Esther did. Like her, many believe that their men have gone mad with sex. But the fact is that such women should understand that men’s craving for the ‘other room’ soccer sessions is quite in order. But out of naivety, self-consciousness, lack of awareness, religious and antiquated traditional norms, most women see the demand as a physical stress and somewhat psychological trauma they should endure.
From a little personal word-of-mouth research, I have discovered that couples view sexual issues differently, given differences in body chemistry. From every indication, sex is actually seen as food that nourishes marriage. It is really good food. If it were not so, how come there are daily conmplaints about sex denial? The growing loud complaints have even awakened religious authorities and bodies to their responsibilities, and this can be seen in the fact that they are organizing sex-related conferences, workshops, seminars and holding other sensitization programmes exclusively meant for married couples. Part of the reasons for rapid rise in the incidence of divorce in the society is sex denial or non-satisfaction by both sides. Therefore, when sex-related programmes are announced, couples show eagerness to attend. Clearly, there is growing conversation on the issue of marital sex unlike in the past.
It is to be noted that this discourse is focused on real couples rather than partners who are just co-habiting. In some situations, sex denial has driven some men to seek it outside their homes, not minding the implications of such adventure. The interpretation and understanding of sex by men is far different from that of the women. A crippled lady once recounted her ordeal in the hands of a sex abuser, just as a mentally deranged woman shared her pathetic experience as tears rolled down her cheeks in the hands of much younger boys who lured her to an uncompleted building where they raped her. There have been reported cases of elderly women being molested by very young men. Such incidents are sheer acts of wickedness, and a portion of hell is awaiting the perpetrators. Whether forced or joyfully executed, there is more to the sex act.
Is sex food? Yes, sex is food, which can become a great meal when served with love, peace and happiness. It brings about strong bonding, happy moments and enriches the life experience for spouses involved. Ask couples who share same room and same bed, you find that marital squabbles are minimal because sexual ‘stroll’ can occur between them in the midst of that disagreement unlike couples who have separate rooms. Sex deserves its time and space for the best result to be achieved. Rather, most women use it as a weapon to fight back when they have issues with their husbands and thereby spoil such happy moment with unnecessary demands. Some would use the opportunity to recall their husbands’ poor conduct, stingy nature; they, therefore destroy such wonderful bonding time. Women, know it from today that oilfield exploration session is not the time to remember your child’s birthday celebration or report your mother-in-law to his son. Neither is it the time to demand for the latest fashion piece in town. Of course, your G.O. is not in the room to monitor your moves and compare that with your mode of worship in church. This is a moment with your soul mate, lying down skin to skin and saying the sweetest things to yourselves. Give each other your due entitlement and watch yourselves marriage glow with the warmth of the experience.
On this score, Mr. Jerry once said: “One of the reasons I love my wife is because she does not refuse me whenever I reach for her. As a teacher, she was busy in the middle of the night, marking and recording scripts; but the moment I needed her, she responded to me fast.”
Mr. Nwanguma chipped in: “In our 25 years of marital bliss, I have never allowed us to have separate bedrooms because I need my fundamental right whenever I want it.” When sexual satisfaction happens, all first names suddenly change into the pet and affectionate forms and even become starry-eyed-romantic titles. The home also becomes a happier place.
Really, men and women who scream, perhaps in frustration, ‘Is sex food?’ may be right because a husband cannot be a write-off when it comes to meeting his financial and other fatherly obligations only to turn around and demand unending sex. Do the needful, pay bills, live up to your responsibilities, be a worthy loving and caring man, then see if sex will not be ready for you at all times. Sex is a serious business and the players must be responsible enough to have and to hold it. It is one form of education where no parent or teacher is engaged, rather a personal experience in life for all.
Now, for those who keep repeating the question, ‘Is sex food?’ know it that sex is good food. I challenge you, would you want us to go back to the dark ages when our great grandfathers were highly polygamous as stories had it? Stories of how men were lords and highly revered then. None of those women joined by polygamy would dare look at her lord and master and ask him, ‘Is sex food?’ when his ‘staff of office’ was all charged up and ready. After all there was competition among bevy of wive for his attention. When your master enters into your hut, you are happy because that day is your new season to receive the principal in all entirety. The same man who is polygamous in nature never hires other men to help him out in his sexual duties. He goes round his women. It is the traditional polygamy which Christianity substituted with one man-one-woman system of marriage that makes men crave for more sex from other sources like side chicks, concubines and prostitutes. Some descend as low as abusing their own children or engage in pedophilia.
To those women who are always quick to ask, ‘Is sex food?’, I want to pose this question: have you taken time to study the health benefits that come with regular sex? According to Dr. Amaka Ocheke, a consultant gynecologist at Jos University Teaching Hospital (JUTH), Plateau State, studies have proved that regular sex assists women during delivery. Other studies have also proved that regular sex is good for the heart. It is a great way to raise the heart and keep the estrogen and testosterone levels in balance. When either one of these is low, the fellow begins to have problems like osteoporosis and even heart disease. The same study also proves that the spermatozoa that comes with sex is very rich and nourishes the woman’s skin very well. But then, how do over 99 per cent of babies come if not through sex?
My good people, know it from today that sex is good food. Let the actors receive it in due season because dead men or women cannot have sexual pleasures.