How would you handle this situation if you were in her shoes or she’s your sister, friend or acquaintance? She’s married with three children. The first are twins, they are 4-years-old. The 3rd is barely 9 months old. They own 2 cars, one for her husband, the other one for her.
Her husband’s best friend visited Nigeria and was meant to be around for a few weeks. Her husband pleaded that she releases her car to his friend so that he can run around town until he leaves. She felt bad because she’s a working mother with little babies and it is not convenient.
Her husband promised to always drop her off at work. It was just a sacrifice that won’t be for long. Her husband’s best friend is a nice guy. He has been quite generous to them. He paid fully for her choice wedding dress during their wedding. He didn’t stop there as he flew into the country to be her husband’s best man. When she considered his sacrifices and all he did for them, she just handed her husband her car keys.
Her husband usually leaves very early to work, while she takes her time to get the kids to school first. It was impossible to meet up with his own time because he tries to rush her. So she gave up on him dropping her off at work and opted for public transport instead.
Trouble started when she joined her boss for his birthday lunch in an exotic restaurant somewhere in town. As her colleague drove into the restaurant’s car park, she saw her car parked and it was a lady behind the wheel. They all went into same restaurant. All the while they were in there, she wasn’t herself and she couldn’t ask the lady why she was with her car. She could be her husband’s friend’s girlfriend she concluded, even though she was a little alarmed.
Once she got home, she asked her husband when his friend is leaving because it was strange that he has not visited nor called since he arrived this time. It was quite unusual and suspicious. He explained that his friend’s visit to Nigeria was impromptu, so he has limited time and will be gone as soon as he’s done with what brought him.
Out of curiosity, the next day at lunch break, she decided to visit same restaurant again and as her cab pulled up she saw her husband’s car, and her own car right next to his. She walked in the restaurant, and sighted her husband with same lady who drove her car the previous day having lunch. She felt like confronting them, but held herself back.
She just wanted to remove all doubts about who exactly the lady in question could possibly be. Her husband and the lady walked out of the restaurant holding hands, talking and smiling to their cars.
Upon seeing his wife, he was weak to his knees. She couldn’t say a word while the Lady was trying to find out what was happening. The wife didn’t even look at the other woman because she didn’t want to create a scene. Her husband left the other woman and walked towards his wife and child with guilt written all over his face.
She told him to give her her car key, which he quickly collected from the other woman and handed over to her immediately. She brought out the other woman’s properties in her car, left them on the floor and drove out of the place.
She couldn’t believe her husband could do this to her. She has tried to let it go but it just won’t go away. She’s not only angry that he cheated but that he could subject her and his own child to untold suffering just to get what he wants from another woman. The more she thinks about it, the more she detests him. She’s hurting badly, and the more he apologizes, the more she wants to be far away from him.
How does she get past this hurt and resentment she feels for him right now? Be our counselor this week.
RE: IF YOU WANT TO LIVE A GOOD LIFE, BE DIFFERENT.
Why do we follow the majority? Is it because they have more reason? No, it is because they have more power. Your corner Amaka’s Diary is indeed a source of inspiration to many. Keep up the good work.
-Nnaemeka
Let me start this by quoting you: “They want to identify with the majority because it is psychologically safer to be with the majority, so they just follow popular trends. It doesn’t matter if what is trending is not the best for them, as long as it is popular; they just go with the flow”
Recently, I gave up my marriage and ran for my life. Beating was my daily bread and nothing I did was good enough. One day I got up and left.
He did everything for me to return, he even forcefully took our only child away to his old mother in his village, yet, I refused to get back with him. There is nothing people didn’t say to me but I have chosen to live. My son is with his grandmother, he is safer there. When they get tired of holding him, they will release him to me. I have visited him in the village where they dumped him. I know the school he attends. One day, I will take him away from there. Until then, I have chosen to be different like you to keep me alive.
Thank you for re-enforcing my belief in being different. My story and struggles are mine and mine alone to tell. One day, I will share stories of my struggles without my 3-year old son. Letting him go was the biggest temptation I faced but I refused to be blackmailed into staying back in hell. Every of your article is a blessing to people dealing with different struggles, this one is for me. Thank you.