What’s the state of your union with Ben Akwuegbu?
I have not seen him for two years now. I don’t know where the court paper is coming from because the problem I’ve had with him all these years is that since we started having issues and I told him okay, ‘let’s divorce so I can move on’, Ben has refused to serve me divorce. Whatever paper he has there, he’s going to be arrested because it’s a forged paper. I have not left this country, the last time I came to Nigeria was three years ago. I have not seen Ben since two years so I don’t know where that divorce is coming from. I don’t know where that letter is coming from. He must have gone to forge the divorce letter somewhere to take it to the Priest and my sister is a Rev. Sister. She is aware of all that is happening; they’ve been communicating with the priests so for the priests, I’m going to call them tomorrow (Thursday) because right now, the issue I have with Ben is, he wants to move on, that’s not a problem. But let’s go and have a proper divorce and he is nowhere to be found. I’m still legally married to him.
Were you living together in London before?
We were living together and at some point, he said he doesn’t want to live with me anymore. That was when he started dating this girl. He moved to his sister’s house in London here and that was it. I’ve not seen him for two years now.
How did you find out about his plan to take another wife?
It was one of my friends that saw the invitation card somewhere and sent it to me.
So you don’t mind getting off the union as long as he’s going to take care of you properly?
He’s not doing anything. That is why, all these years, I have been dealing with my problem myself with my children. Though he communicates with them on the phone, he sends them little money once in a while but I have been the one taking care of my children and that’s why Ben doesn’t want to divorce me legally. He doesn’t want to do it the proper way because he doesn’t want to pay any money. He doesn’t want to support me because right now, I’m happy for him to move on but only if he can come out and divorce me and let’s share the property and that’s it. I can have something for my children before he starts another life with another wife.
How do you know he has property to share?
We acquired property together when we were together. He has to bring them out. I was married to Ben all these years when he was playing football. I have an 18-year-old child; I have 15; I have 13. I was with him when he was playing football and I was there when we were buying the property. So he needs to provide for them. All the property is in his name; he never put my name on it. The children’s names are not there. So since two years, I’ve not been with him, I don’t know what he has done with them but he has to bring them out because I’ve got children: two boys and a girl and I’ve been the only one for these children.
How much do you think the asset you need to share with him is worth at the moment?
The house we have in Abuja is almost 300 or 400 million naira. We have two property in Europe here. We have land property in Abuja there. We have landed property in Owerri; we have a house in Owerri; we have house in Jos. We have about five, six property he needs to bring to the table. The last time I checked, that was the property I acquired with him together. I was the one bringing the money to support him to get the property. We bought this property for future … for our children so he has to bring them before he moves on with his new family. We can’t be bothered about him going on with his marriage but let him come and divorce me properly. I’m still Mrs. Akwuegbu.
Did you think there was something you did wrong to make him walk out of the marriage?
His family has never liked me so they went for him not to stay with me. I have never done anything wrong. I have only been supportive to him all the while I was with him. I have never done anything wrong to Ben. The only thing that started this whole thing was when I went to Nigeria with him, when I went to Austria we sold this property together. Something happened. He locked me out with my children out of the house and he took his family inside. I was like: why will he do that? That was an eye opener to me. I was like I need to get something doing and Austria is not a place where you can get a good job. I told him to put the property in the children’s name so I can be more confident that this marriage is secured because the way he was going with his family, I didn’t like it. I never asked him to put my name but the children’s name but he refused. His family has been behind our problems; they’ve been behind the problem of both of us. Even when I moved on to London here, he was coming to see me from time to time. He was coming to stay with us but when his sister moved from Nigeria to London, he stopped coming to my house and started going to the sister’s place to stay. I said no problem. I don’t want drama in my life. He goes on telling people what I didn’t do. I can’t be bothered because he was the one cheating, doing all kinds of things and I’ve been quiet about it thinking it will get better but it never got better.
He said you were the one cheating on him?
That’s what he will say. Can he bring the evidence? If I want to talk about cheating, Ben has been cheating from the onset that I got married to him and this is the only thing he can say to walk me out. Okay, whether I’m cheating or not, if he wants to move on with his life, no problem. He has been dating this girl for four years now. Who is cheating here? All the time he has been coming to me here, he has been dating this girl. The girl is based in Nigeria. My concern is, whether he’s cheating or I’m cheating, I’ve gone past that stage. Ben has been telling people that about me and that’s the only thing he can say to defend the rubbish he’s doing now.
Is it that he caught you with any man or he saw any text message?
Ben has never caught me with anything, I have been faithful to him but the truth of the matter is, what do you expect a man that is doing all these nonsense to say? It’s a criminal offence that he’s married to a woman and wants to get married to another person. He should be careful about what he’s doing because he might end up in jail in Europe here. I’m careful about it all. I don’t want the Europe people to know what’s going on because if they find out that he’s still married to me legally and getting married to someone else, and he has divorce papers that are forged and I wasn’t there, he will go to jail. We got married in Nigeria. We had court marriage in magistrate court. That’s why he went to court to get forged papers because we went to court in Nigeria and in Nigeria anything can happen. He got the forged papers there because I’m just hearing it for the first time. I’m not aware. I have a lawyer now trying to help me file for divorce. I don’t know where he got his, from. If you can, ask him that question. I haven’t spoken to Ben. He has not called me. He’s the one doing the whole thing. He’s the one to be contacted. I don’t know where Ben is at the moment. He’s hiding from me.
Do you have any regrets marrying him at all?
I won’t say I have any regrets. I have children with him. My beautiful children are there so if I say I’m regretting, that means I don’t appreciate my children. That’s it.