No matter what we say or write, they will still have their way. And that’s because they’ve always had their way while the rest of the people had their say. It’s historical. But we the people must still say something. One of such is the matter of the House of Representatives (Rebelsentatives) placing order for 400 exotic cars, reportedly the Toyota Camry 2020 model, as their utility vehicles.
They opted for this brand of car in lieu of the Nigerian-made Innoson cars. Let’s break it down. Utility cars simply means official cars; cars that would help our highly revered lawmakers discharge their duties in our collective interest. I will not join those hypocritically castigating our hard-working lawmakers. They deserve all the comfort they can buy with tax-payers’ money. I will never join the pretending mob of critics who are busy pontificating about our parliamentarians’ lack of patriotism. They are patriots by nature, and much more so by duty.
Can you imagine sitting for 181 days out of 365 days of the year just to make laws for the good governance of the nation? What can be more patriotic than that? And they do so whether they are happy or not. They do so risking their lives as their leadership has told us there is a plan to attack them in the sacred chambers of the National Assembly. We should appreciate their efforts, sacrifice and peerless sense of duty. And why can’t some idlers and busybodies leave our parliamentarians alone. Why can’t they mind their own business or better still worry about other matters of urgent national importance?
Those who do not see the wisdom in the action of the House members should reflect on these. Our honourable members must be seen to be honourable in all their ways. They should not for instance be seen inside or anywhere near any automobile made within the country. That’s infra dig and diminishes their honourable values and utilities. A Toyota Camry (2020 edition; not 2019 or 2018) is just what they deserve. We should not expect honorable people who sit in a hallowed chamber to make laws for the good governance of all of us to be burdened with locally-made (locally-assembled) cars. There is no honour in such basal gesture that dims their essence and esteem.
We should show our honourables more respect. Or haven’t you heard that even President Muhammadu Buhari has also joined in berating those who think of our lawmakers as a bunch of over-paid drones who merely gather and share money for doing nothing. Buhari, just like this writer, believes that it’s a misnomer to continue to censure members of the National Assembly. He believes they are hardworking and they’re only unlucky for not getting their due and deserved praise.
Fellow Nigerians, we must learn to honour our honourable members. What really is 400 cars for 360 hardworking people? And why should we ever harbour the primitive thought that such cars should be sourced from Nnewi in Anambra State? We should be glad that they were humble enough to settle for a mere Camry as utility cars. What if they had chosen the G-Wagon, a Rolls Royce or even a Bentley? Calling them out for picking a Toyota Camry over an Innoson brand is a show of ingratitude and total lack of respect for those who take the pains to make laws on our behalf. They go through so much stress trying to make these laws. Some deny themselves lavish holidays abroad; some deny themselves deep sleep plus slumber in their palatial homes and only settle for a nap in the chambers; we should appreciate them.
Again, what is 400 Toyota Camry cars for a people we are spending N37 billion to renovate their offices. If we can spend N37 billion to renovate (not build) offices of our lawmakers, should we not be pleased when the same lawmakers cut cost by opting for common Toyota Camry when they deserve a Bentley? Nigerians should appreciate sacrifice when they see one. It is a salute to their humility, patriotism and matchless appetite for service to humanity that they will take the long-suffering option of a Camry when their country can afford a Rolls Royce for each of them. If Nigerians don’t appreciate the humility and modesty of their honourable members, I do.
I hereby move a motion to the effect that all their vehicles, whether utility or luxury cars, should be bullet-proof. Yes, we cannot take the risk of subjecting our highly dutiful lawmakers to the whims of bandits, kidnappers, insurgents and other home-grown criminals scouring our highways, byways and homes looking for whom to destroy. The lawmakers should as a matter of compelling national importance ensure that all their cars are bullet-proof. We must shield them from the bullets of the dishonourable goons.
No serious nation treats her honourable men and women with levity, let alone expose them to the vagaries of vagrants and hoboes. Such men and women are treated with utmost respect, reverence and veneration. Nigeria cannot be an exception. Our lawmakers are our treasure. They are special. They are full of good deeds. They fight for our rights. They have demonstrated uncommon devotion to making good laws including promoting a bill to establish a commission specifically for repented terrorists (Thank you Senator Ibrahim Gaidam).
You see what I mean? Our lawmakers are special. None like them anywhere in the world. They alone understand that a terrorist is not a criminal who should be prosecuted but someone who when arrested, should be quarantined a for weeks or a few months and subsequently allowed back into the same society he sought to destroy only a couple of months back. This is the stuff of our lawmakers. They do great things; great things like marrying four wives and siring 27 children with verdant prospects for more children and herding the four wives into the chamber to introduce them to your colleagues in a vainglorious show of phallic triumphalism.
Our lawmakers are special. They have shown us unquantifiable affection and affectation. It’s only natural that we the people also reciprocate. And one way to do this is to allow them have their way in matters bordering on their individual and collective comfort. That’s the least we can do for a people toiling night and day including engaging in fiery fisticuffs inside the hallowed chambers for our sake.
It’s on this score that I will refrain from deprecating our honourable men and women. I can only have my say but I must allow them have their way. With the quantum of work they do, the high risks they take and the humiliation they suffer for our sake, they deserve more than ordinary Toyota Camry 2020 edition which by the way is yet to hit the Nigerian market, meaning they might just be the first set of Nigerians to drive this special car. They deserve their exotic cars. We have no reason to grumble because “all animals are equal but some are more equal than others.” All the talk about Buy Nigeria, Eat Nigeria is for the proletariat. The Reps deserve their luxury and we must let them be, please!