Rose Ejembi, Makurdi
For Mr and Mrs Taiwo Edekere, the adage that destiny can be delayed, but can never be changed proved very true. The two visually impaired people got married recently at a modest wedding in Makurdi, Benue State.
Taiwo, an indigene of Edo State and a staff of Government Special School for the Blind, Ekiti State, said he met Grace, an indigene of Adoka Ipole, Otukpo Local Government Area of Benue State in 2017 when she was posted to the school under the National N-Power programme as a teacher:
“I found out that she’s an educated lady and a good woman who can support me. I so much love her because I noticed that she has suiting words whenever I’m in any problem. When I noticed all these qualities in her, I started pursuing her to see how we can get married.”
And for eight months, Grace would not accept Taiwo’s marriage proposal because according to her, some people she thought she could trust in their locality, advised her not to marry him:
“I met my husband already working here in the same school where I work. Initially when he approached me for marriage, I refused because I felt he is an elderly person. On a second thought, I felt that marriage for visually impaired persons is not an easy thing as nobody goes for them because of their impairment.
“When the battle was hot, I refused but when I saw those who were fighting for me not to accept his proposal were in turn suggesting another lady for him to marry, that was when I accepted his proposal.
“His family and mine accepted our relationship. We came to a conclusion that we should formalise our marriage relationship by getting married at the registry.
«What made me to accept his proposal was the fact that I saw people who did not want us to marry suggesting other girls to him to marry. I saw envy in all of that and then decided to marry him. I love him because he is an unapologetic giver, honest, a man of his words and also God fearing.»
Asked how they would be able cope as a couple with visual impairment. Taiwo responded: “Two blind people coming into marriage is not something difficult. When we were in school, we were taught how to do domestic work unaided and independently. We were taught so many things. Since I got to know her, she has been so wonderful. She is simply a good woman and a wife material.
«Though in other parts of the country, it may be strange seeing two blind people coming together in marriage but it is not new in the South West and the North. Here, you see visually impaired couple with their children. In fact, in the school where we work, some of our colleagues here are married to their blind counterparts. So, it is not something so difficult or new.»
The journey to blindness
Taiwo 51, said he became blind in 1998 while preparing for his ICAN examination after working for some years in the banking sector:
“I was born on July 5, 1968. I became blind in 1998. I went to St. Mathias Catholic School, Lagos, after which I proceeded to Government College, Osborn Road in Ikoyi Lagos. I waited for sometimes and then worked with Nigerian International Bank, Victoria Island, Lagos. I then put in for my ICAN course and was in the process of becoming a chartered accountant when I got blind.
“After I became blind, I went for rehabilitation at the Oshodi Special School for the Blind. I was rehabilitated and trained in Vocational Training. I was later to be employed as an instructor in Government Special School for the Blind, Ekiti State, in 2008. That is where I work till date.”
Grace disclosed that she became blind after she was hit by meningitis at the age of eight: “I was born into the family of Mr Samuel and Mrs Josephine Adanu from Adoka Ipole in Otukpo Local Government area of Benue State. I was born in 1977. I am the third born from a family of seven.
“At the age of eight, I came down with meningitis while in primary school. I attended Our Lady of Perpetual Help Primary School, Ankpa Quarters, Makurdi. I could not go to school for some years after I had meningitis.
“Initially when the meningitis came up, my parents took me to Madonna Hospital in Makurdi. From there, I was taken to the Teaching Hospital in Kano and another private hospital without any success.
«It was after this that I was taken for native medication and I got cured. The hospitals were just giving me injections and I was always convulsing. Immediately the meningitis attacked me, I was feeling fever and headache in school. By the time I returned home from school, it got worse.
“That night, I was feeling like throwing up and I rushed to go outside and on my way, I discovered that the light just went off. So, I said ‘no light, I need light’, but they said there was light. That was when my sight went off and since then I couldn’t see again till date.
“In 1991, at the age if 13, my daddy took me to Child Evangelism Fellowship Ministry (CEFM); a special school in Otukpo where I did only four years because I skipped some classes. From there, I went to St. Ann’s Secondary School, Otukpo and finished in 1996. After that, I proceeded to the University of Jos, Plateau State, where I studied Special Education with specialty in Visual Handicap to teach the blind. I graduated in 2012.
“When I finished, I started a part-time teaching job with the School for the Exceptional Children, Aliade. There, I wasn’t well paid at all so, I left and applied for work at Apa Local Government Council. I was there for more than two before my employment was terminated.
“It was after the termination of my employment that I applied for N-Power work. I opted to work outside Benue State for fear that I might not get the job if I chose Benue. I got the job and was posted to Ekiti State. This is my third year in Ekiti. I teach Basic Science, Health Education and Civic Education.
“The period of courtship was so tough because of the people surrounding us. It was not easy because some people around us (not members of our families) didn’t want us to marry. Some of my friends said I shouldn’t mind that it’s always like that in marriage.”
Grace has a piece of advice for all visually impaired persons: «Majority of my fellow visually impaired ladies are not married. The only thing the society can do to them is to give them unwanted pregnancy and then dump them in their parent’s house. So, why don›t they marry their fellow visually impaired person? Already, they›re trained to cope so that life can be sweet.»