Pity her, a mum and her only son, her last born, discussing a sex issue! A lady told me her pains the day she was teaching sex matters to her son.

Osondu Anyalechi

In 1948, my first year in school, our teacher asked us, how babies were born. I had no idea and nobody in the class volunteered an answer, even the big boys: Ikwuagwu Ihejirika, Okoronkwo Ajuwa, Chinyere Okorie, Ibeji Ozuemba, Nwoha Chigbu… That night, without blushing, I asked my mum. Her face faded instantly but I could not understand what gave rise to it. Stammering like someone passing through excruciating pains, she told me. I could not grasp what she said. I had been seeing pregnant women tying wrappers on their waists, leaving the rest of their bodies bare, and their bellies, protruding in a scary manner. One day, their stomachs would return to their normal size. I wondered…

It was when I grew up that I appreciated the mental torture my mother passed through that night she was answering my innocent question on childbearing. Pity her, a mum and her only son, her last born, discussing a sex issue! A lady told me her pains the day she was teaching sex matters to her son. A tutor in Federal Science School, she said that shyness made her to be careful in choosing her words. While she would describe the male and female organs, her son would call them by their names without blushing! In UK, a Pastor was taken aback, when he was educating his ‘innocent’ daughter about condom, and she entered her room and brought out hers! May God forgive my teacher for asking us how babies are born! May God forgive me, six-year-old, for asking that torturous question to my mum! May God forgive youths for being bolder than their parents on sex issues! My mum felt that way, for she was a woman. In fact, my mum was a woman!

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The Sun newspaper of August 11, 2018, however, carried a report of how a woman lured her son to sexual relationship with her. I did not say, ‘how a prostitute…’ I said, ‘how a mother…’ According to the report credited to her by the Saturday Sun newspaper, she had a son in her first marriage. Her husband died within a year of her marriage, and she went into business later, and it brought her to a relationship with a widower, which culminated into marriage. She alleged that there was suffocating pres- sure mounted on her by her mother-in-law, when there was no conception. While she was willing to meet a gynaecologist for test, her husband was not.

To test her fertility, so as to know if the problem was from her, she decided to be having sex with her son. She started to bribe him with gifts and then told him the need for sex education. She asked him whether he had had sex before and his reply was in the negative. She then started to share bed with him, where she would put off her noble garment of motherhood, and adorned the shameful one of a prostitute! Fumbling his penis to arouse him sexually, she would then induce him to sex. Her son? Yes, her own son! She alleged that she was doing that during her ovulation period so that she would be pregnant and have a child for her husband and thus, save her marriage. No one can conjecture why she should fear her husband and then sin against God and her son. Now, there is honey in the hive. Aunty is three months pregnant! Her pretence that her husband was responsible failed as he argued that he slept last with her two months before her pregnancy took place. What happened in darkness is now common knowledge. Her husband has thrown her out of his house. Who knows if her parents will do the same?

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A mother is a mother because she is a mother. I doubt if this Aunty is one. “The fear of God,” the Bible says, “is the beginning of wisdom”. There is no atom of wisdom in what she did, being not guided by the fear of God. It had happened in the US, a woman, inducing her son to sex. At the spot he had wanted to commit suicide, God sent him a lifeline. He saw a Church signboard and rang the minister, who led him to Christ. In another case in the US, not only was the woman sleeping with her son, but both of them decided to marry. They were jailed but they decided to relocate to a State that would tolerate their abnormality after their incarceration.

It may not be strange utterly in the US for a mother to bear a child for her son, but it is in Nigeria. In that God’s Own country, children of same parents and of opposite sexes are not allowed by law to share a room. It is normal here, even those not related, and there may be no sexual abuse. It is true that in Nigeria, some abnormal men have slept with their daughters, but I have never heard that women, even idol worshippers, have slept with their sons. During the civil war, when I was an unbeliever, I participated in public oath taking in my village. The oldest man recited the things we would not do, or we would die: ‘Robbery, poisoning someone, dealing in Indian hemp, sleeping with a brother’s wife…’ The word ‘brother’ was all embracing. It meant the wife of any man in my village. Nothing was said about a woman sleeping with her son or a man, sleeping with his daughter, because, nobody was doing that! That evil act was not even imagined.

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While Aunty is now condemning herself for what she did, it is surprising that she is basking in the euphoria that she chose to sleep with her son because he is within her family, instead of doing so with an outsider. What she forgets is that marriage is for only two people and so is sex – husband and wife! There is no provision for a third party, whether a dad, mum, son, daughter, et cetera! What she did is worse than going outside because it involves adultery and incest. By her action, she has exposed her son to evil, so that after learning and graduating in it, he will be doing the same thing with any of his daughters. Is it not our prayer that our children will excel us? If her son excels her in this evil practice, he will then be doing the same thing with all his daughters! Chineke!

Does a human being satisfy his cravings anyhow, because of need, without considering the implications? Should a mum’s interest override the wellbeing of her child? If she does, it is the manifestation of selfishness. I wonder where Aunty hid her face, when she saw him the next morning. Did he greet her as his Mum or as a sex mate? When the baby arrives, will he be calling him, ‘My brother’ or ‘My son’?

Where did Aunty learn this abominable thing – books or from someone? What happened after conceiving such an evil thought? Did she go for counselling? If so, who? Did she consider what her son would do, if he has no child in his marriage? Will he not claim this one? Sin is evil. It is worse, like this one, when God and idol worshippers frown at it.

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For further comment, Please contact: Osondu Anyalechi: 0802 3002471; anyalechiosondu@yahoo.com