One of the worst things that can happen in the life of a child of God is living a life of hypocrisy. In that case, the way he lives at home is quite different from the way and manner he behaves outside his house – in the Church, office, place of business, et cetera. His family members are surprised when he makes certain contributions in public about his life or life in general, especially during the Sunday school or Bible Study in the Church, as they contradict his lifestyle at home.
A few weeks ago, I watched a video clip about a Pastor and his wife. After dressing up to go on a retreat, the Pastor went to their living room, where his wife was busy, doing something. He greeted her in a most affectionate manner, and then told her that he was ready for the retreat. Though suspicious of his unusual lavish greetings, she appreciated the dress he was wearing. In a very humble manner, he requested a loan of N500 from her, assuring her that, though he owed her N1, 300, he would pay the old and the new debts, totaling N1, 800. Aunty kept mum. He went on to remind her that he was talking to her. She told him that she would not lend him.
“No wonder you were greeting me in this manner, calling me endearing names, ye ye man… Ole… I will not give you,” she insulted him brazenly. The man of God reminded her that he was the head of the family and that she should respect the anointing of God on him. “Which anointing are you referring to? Do you mean anointing or ‘annoyance’?” She asked him. Ridiculing him further, she reminded him that his anointing was the type that could not feed his family. She told him, as she pointed to the Bible he was holding, that God’s Word says that if any man cannot provide for his family, he is worse than an infidel. “That’s the only Scripture you know,” he defended.
In great anger, he warned her not to utter any word again or he would pour his wrath on her. The devil was fueling the squabble, and it was escalating to the point of fighting, when a visitor knocked at their door. In the most dramatic manner, Aunty started admiring her husband’s necktie, running her fingers on it and on his face, like a new couple. The visitor was impressed and believed that she was a model Christian wife. Ignorant of the reality behind the fascia, he started questioning God, why He did not give him a wife like ‘Mummy’, the Pastor’s wife. We often blame God that He did not make us like some of our friends or neighbours, since we do not know what they are passing through. If that visitor had known that his wife was better than the Pastor’s wife, he would have appreciated God, instead of blaming Him. Imagine, if God had answered his prayer, by making his wife to behave like the Pastor’s wife! He had come to see the Pastor for his wife’s altercation. It was the first time she was doing what had been the morning tea of the Pastor’s wife! Would his wife have behaved that way, if she was exposed to pastoral conferences like the Pastor’s wife? Uncle would have opted to leave that Church for the Pastor and his wife, had he entered their house without knocking! My niece wept bitterly the day two of us visited a couple and met them fighting, a thing she had never seen or imagined in my house.
He told the couple that what brought him to them was that his wife insulted him because he owed her N7, 000. The Pastor’s wife was angry with her, wondering where she might have learnt that stubborn nature from. “Why should she not know that a husband is the head of his family? That was the reason, why Sarah was calling Abraham ‘Lord’. I obey my husband in all things in this house,” she said. Turning to her husband, she asked amusingly, “Darling, is it not so?”
The Pastor condemned husbands that borrow money from their wives and would not pay back. There and then, he counted out N7, 000 and gave to the man to give to his wife, telling him that the money was from his wife! That was the Pastor that did the same thing with his wife, condemning what he was doing! Pretence means that the person knows what is right but chooses to live a double-standard life, deceiving, not only other people, but even himself. This explains why God holds them accountable for their misdeeds.
One wonders the essence of pretence. In this case, the Pastor and his wife had put on a friendly posture immediately they saw their guest, so as to protect their image. It would affect the man’s respect for them, if he had met them exchanging words. It is unfortunate that most people care about the feelings of their fellow human beings, more than that of God. This is why they hide under the rug the evil things they do, but forget that God sees them. We should please God more than we labour to please our fellow human beings. In giving, some people are very liberal when they are giving to people, they believe will reward them. They do not give much, however to God. This is self deception.
Imagine a Pastor’s wife, calling him a thief! Would the Church money be safe in his hand! Imagine a Pastor’s wife calling him ‘ye ye man’! Would she be listening to and benefitting from his messages in the Church? Imagine her, ridiculing her husband’s anointing, calling it ‘annoyance’! She might be right, as every wife knows her husband more than anybody. I wrote in one on my books, that it would be better to consult a wife before her husband is made an Elder or Deacon in the Church. If we do, some wives will object.
Madam lied, claiming that she was submissive to her spouse, when she was not. Uncle claimed that it was not good to be borrowing from a wife and not paying back. That was what he did that caused the misunderstanding. It was from his pocket that he brought out the N7,000, which he gave to his visitor, and that was a man, who wanted to borrow N500 from his wife, pretending that he had no money! He even lied that it was his wife that gave the N7,000, when she was not.
How would Uncle Pastor still be ministering, praying for people, administering Holy Communion, et cetera, with this reckless life of cursing, lying, and almost fighting with his wife? I wonder how he would command demons to go out from the afflicted people, and they would obey him, since they knew that he was not living out his faith. I wonder what would be the feeling of their children, housemaids and servants, towards Christianity, if a Pastor and his wife should be behaving in this sad manner. They need to be born-again.
For further comment, Please contact: Osondu Anyalechi: 0802 3002-471; [email protected]