We will conclude our discussion on ‘The Little Foxes’ today, starting with ‘The Little Fox of Pride’, which manifests in some homes. A proud person looks down on the spouse, and does what he likes without consulting or involving the partner. A certain Uncle built a house and furnished it without telling his wife. She wept when she saw it. In Matt. 18:19, the Lord Jesus said that a couple, if they agree, will receive from God what they ask. Eve was Adam’s help-meet. She would not be, if she was ignorant of what he was doing. I know certain things better than my wife and so does she, more than me. This is why synergy is needful in marriage.
‘The Little Fox of Sex’ is a subtle destroyer of homes. I used to organize Marriage Seminars at Sea School, Apapa, for couples from different Churches and professions. We would spend the whole day talking about marriage. Living a life of chastity seems to affect our attitude towards sex. Most believers know that it is sinful outside marriage but forget that it is pleasurable in marriage, and thus recommended for couples – 1Cor. 7:3-5. Some Christians think that abstinence from it promotes holiness. I rather think otherwise! A Christian lady complained bitterly that many men are selfish during sex, satisfying only themselves and do not consider the interest of their wives. Men’s defence is that the blame is on their wives for sex denial and their indifference during sex. Of the eight grounds for divorce, sex denial ranks first.
‘The Little Fox of Unforgiveness’ destroys the vine in many homes. In Acts 13:13, John Mark left Paul and Barnabas on the lurch at Perga in Pamphylia. The possible reason could be the change of leadership from his uncle to Paul, who was discipled by his uncle. Barnabas was always mentioned first and Paul, last. In v2, the Holy Spirit said, “Separate to Me Barnabas and Saul…” – 13:1 and v2. See also v7 – “…Barnabas and Saul”. In v13, it was no more like that, but, “Paul and his company.” Could that be the reason, why Paul insisted that John Mark would not go with them?
John Mark was Uncle Barnabas’ relation, no doubt, but did he insist that John must go with them because of that or did he see a new John Mark? Was Osondu Anyalechi, who was holding his girlfriend’s hand that April 16, 1972, they were going to CAC to disprove the ‘lies’ he thought he was told about cripples walking and the blind receiving their sight during the ministration of Dr. Evelyn Whyte, the same Osondu Anyalechi, the Lord Jesus was holding his hands as he was singing aloud from the Church back to the Campus?
Do we give a second chance to people, who have offended us? When Paul was born-again, nobody believed him. Did Uncle Barnabas, true to his name, ‘Son of consolation’, not give him a second chance – Acts 9:25-27? Why should it be strange if he did the same to John Mark? Do you do the same to your spouse? In Col.4:10 and 2Tim 4:11, Paul wrote that John Mark was useful to him in the ministry. Publishing that reveals Paul’s humility and the benefit of a second chance. For John to work with Paul, who rejected him, reveals that he [John] surrendered all to Jesus. The Lord Jesus and Stephen prayed that God should forgive their murderers – Luke 23:34 and Acts 7:60. In Mark 11:26 the Bible tells us that God will not forgive us unless we forgive others. May we forgive the offences of our spouses and children. A lady was always angry because of her height. May she forgive God for that!
In 2 Sam 6:13-22, God’s people were celebrating the successful bringing back of the Ark of God to the city of David. Michal, David’s wife, did not join them. Pride, as a Princess, could have caused it or her ignorance of God and the Ark, since King Saul, her dad, was not spiritual. May we be careful in choosing our fathers-in-law! She was looking rather through the widow to find her husband’s faults. If we look for our spouses’ faults, we shall find them! Though absent, David brought foodstuffs for her. Opening the door, she saw him and started to insult him, rather than welcoming and appreciating him for the success of the programme. .
David, coming out from God’s presence, erred in joining issues with her, and went to the extreme of insulting her late dad, his father-in-law! May we limit our problems with our spouses and never extend them to their family members.
The real problem was that Michal lived in anger. God was not consulted in their marriage. Saul wanted David to marry his daughter so that he would have access to kill him. The acceptable bride price was to cost David his life. Michal, hearing that he had sent people to kill David, informed him and helped him to escape. Saul, in anger, could have killed her. David left her incommunicado but trusted Jonathan, her brother, and was relating with him until he escaped. We should never love or trust anybody more than our spouse.
When David was the king, he sent for Michal, though her father had given her out in marriage. Childless, she came to the Palace, thinking perhaps, that things were still the way they were, but met what she never conjectured – the six sons of David from six wives! That might have grieved her also.
‘The Little Foxes of Pride’ could be found also in the house of Nabal. David sent his servants to him the day he was shearing his sheep and requested that he gave him some. Without consulting Abigail, his wife, since God says that, “Two are better than one,” Ecclesiastics 4:9, he took the decision alone and even insulted David. David and his four hundred men left to destroy him and his family but for one of his men, who reported the matter to his wife, detailing how David and his men were protecting them and their sheep.
A help-meet in deed, Abigail bought pleasant things for David and bowed on the ground, when she met him, pleading for his mercy. David accepted her plea. Reaching home, she met a wild party taking place and once again, her husband, a proud man, did not see the need why she should be part of it! One wonders, who bought the things and cooked the food! A wise wife, seeing that he was drunk, she did not tell him about the doom that would have befallen him! It was in the morning that she told him and he died of heart attack!
Did she do well all through? I doubt. Pleading with David, she called her husband a fool. Why was she toasting David, by telling him to remember her when things improved with him? Hearing that Nabal was dead, as she had requested, David remembered her, sent for her and she joined his harem.
For further comment, Please contact: Osondu Anyalechi: 0802 3002-471; [email protected]