When you first start dating someone, and you are in that honeymoon phase when you both know you are into each other, you aren’t dating other people, but everything is still new and exciting, nothing can get in the way of your sex life.
You just won’t have it. If you need to wake up in four hours, you will have sex. If every dish is still dirty from the dinner you made, you will still get it on.
You might be late to some occasion because you were doing the deed. Sex comes before everything else at the start of a relationship.
Later, after you have been together for several years, the complete opposite becomes true. Everything comes before sex. Once you have built a life together, things just change.
There is always something demanding your attention or energy and sex can fall to the wayside. If you have been with your partner for a while then you will understand this.
Here are things that interfere with sex life in a long-term relationship.
Your social life
When you are a serious couple, your social calendar becomes twice as packed. You are now contending with two social networks and between the two of them, there’s always something vying for your time. This can affect your sex life and prevent couples from connecting with one another sexually.
Money talk
If you have joined lives, then you probably need to talk finances. You have shared financial goals, and your spending habits affect one another. But nobody really feels in the mood after discussing budgets.
Sleep schedules
You just don’t get it on unless you are working with the same sleep schedule. If you aren’t, then one person is already fast asleep while the other one is just getting home and starting to make dinner. Nobody stays up, waiting for the other anymore to enjoy sizzling sex. And being woken up early for morning sex? That might cause a fight.
Phone calls with parents
It’s just weird to have sex within thirty minutes of chatting on the phone with your parents. Maybe in the beginning of the relationship, you would brush it off, but not now.
Household chore conversations
When you have been together for a long time, you probably live together, and that means you have to talk about things like who is leaving crumbs on the kitchen counter and who clogged the sink. These are not sexy conversations.
You forget because you are having fun
Sometimes, couples forget to have sex for a couple of weeks because they are having fun. It seems they are always doing something entertaining like going on a vacation, seeing that movie they have been eager to see, or meeting up with friends. They just don’t realize that they have made no time for sex.
Discussing lack of sex life
Talking about the fact that you aren’t having sex might put a stop to sex for the night. And yet, you just can’t help it. You always bring up the fact that you are not having enough sex.
Social media
You log onto social media and see all kinds of things that turn you off. You might see a sad video, a picture of an ex, a depressing article and ill-mannered people throwing tantrums. You have been together for a while now so you aren’t going to pretend this content hasn’t upset you.
Weird social interaction
You could and would brush these off early in the relationship. If a server was rude or you ran into an old friend that you had a falling out with, you would somehow forget it, and be perky enough to have sex later. But you become more real about how these things affect you when you have been together for a while and sometimes, you are just in a weird mood to have sex.
Fear that it’s getting stale
Some people worry about having sex after many years because they fear it will go stale. Are you only allowed so many good sessions as a couple? Should couples enjoy sex slowly as compared to many times in the past?
A messy bedroom
If you live together then you might share the same bedroom. So when you make your way into that bedroom to have sex, someone may comment on the fact that it’s time to clean the sheets, or someone left their clothes on the floor, and the mood is ruined.