The past is a place we like to look back to sometimes and there are many things we keep in memory of the past and our best kept memory is in form of pictures. Pictures help us to keep memories alive, once we see them, our memories are flooded with thoughts. There are certain pictures we keep to remind us of ourselves, those we used to know or love.

Why do you keep pictures? I mean pictures from way back, old flames, exes, late spouses, friends, family and colleagues. What pictures of the past do you still keep? Why do you still keep and where? Let me quickly tell you a true life story to drive home my point.

Some years ago, a certain young man actually gave a lady a chase. She was a girl who just blossomed into a beautiful woman, she had every young man in the hood running to catch up with her. They all wanted a feel of her, but she didn’t give any of them any definite answer, so all of them kept coming and hoping she chooses any of them. On many occasions, men bump into one another while waiting to see her.

Among the men was a contractor from Abuja, he came and took over completely.  He gave her a spoiling, he had some cool cash to throw around. Before you knew it, she was rolling with him and there was a wedding and they were pronounced husband and wife.

All was well until his business crumbled and he was basically home with her always. He noticed a cupboard that he has never had access to since he got married to his wife, this he never took note of while he was up and doing business, but now that he’s fully home he noticed it, so he asked that she opens the cupboard, but she refused with the claim it’s her personal stuff that were in there. He made efforts to convince her to open it but she stood her grounds. The next day while the wife was away from home, the husband with the help of a hammer unlocked the cupboard. What he saw left him heart broken.

What he saw were pictures of his wife’s ex-lovers, letters they wrote her then and a diary with their phone numbers. Upon her return home, she flared up immediately he confronted her on what he saw in the closet. She claimed they were just for memory and no strings attached, but her husband won’t take that. The problem was that while he was furious and accusing her of keeping those pictures because she has an ulterior motive, she reminded him that hers were carefully tucked away in a closet, but his own exes’ pictures he splashed in their family album. Now, these are two adults doing the same thing differently, while the wife locked hers away in a closet, her husband displayed his in the open and in the family photo album, where even visitors have access to.

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Today, you see families having it hot because either of them was once married and lost his or her spouse, (Scenerios like this may be excused) after remarrying, the new partner insists that every memory their spouse shared with their late partner in the form of pictures be destroyed. They can’t stand the sight of such even when it is hidden in a closet, they just want it gone and not kept any where in the house. This often leaves couples in big fights.

But sincerely, just think about it, how do you want him/her to just shut down every memory of their late partner? That was somebody that if it was not for death, they would probably still be married and it is not that they are still going to see the person around or even cheat on you with them any way, but I feel you should let them keep a few pictures of them, may be not hanging on the wall but in their own closet.

The one that beats imagination is a married woman or man who still keeps his/her exes’ pictures, some even display such in their family album, while others hide theirs in a cupboard or travelling bag. And you wonder why people do that when they are fully settled with another. One day, just one day, the husband or wife will stumble on such and start reading different meanings into it. Such fights end in trust issues which often lead to a serious rift stemming from jealousy especially when either of them knew such persons then as a rival.

Some dramas are absolutely unnecessary if we want to have a happy life and happy home. It may not be a big deal to you knowing or seeing that your partner still has his or her exes’ pictures, but to your partner it may be a big deal and you must learn to leave the past in the past where it belongs. Some old flames will definitely remain in our hearts, yes, let them remain there but definitely not in pictures in the home you share with your wife or husband.

It’s problematic keeping your exes’ pictures and love letters after your are married to someone else. Are those pictures kept as a memorabilia, souvenir or to tell whoever cares to listen that he or she used to be the love of your life and the best one you never had as a wife or husband? Do you still keep your exes’ pictures or even letters? Why do you still have them? Would you be cool when you find your wife’s or husband’s exes’ pictures fixed in your family album or hidden in a closet you don’t have access to?

Your partner may not voice out her hurt or displeasure that you still securely keep your exes’ pictures and letters, but sometimes this can cripple a relationship beyond repairs. Some lovers are very much the jealous type and may not take it lightly if they find out. Tear those pictures today and thank me later.