Men are known to do serious back ground checks on women they intend to marry, but with recent happenings and marriages packing up every day, there’s need for ladies to genuinely and objectively dig into their men’s background as well before saying ‘I do’.
Your values should not be in disarray or your life put in jeopardy because you are desperate to settle down.
Find out what exactly he does for a living. You may not necessarily do this particular finding yourself, send trusted family members or even pay agents to snoop around on your behalf.
A lot of young men are fronting businesses or offices as a cover while they are hard drug dealers, internet fraudsters, kidnappers, armed robbers, thugs, hired killers etc.
Many women are languishing in jail today because proceeds of such businesses were lodged in their accounts, stolen phones and laptops and even hard drugs were found in their possession and they couldn’t explain how they came about them.
Find out if your man is family- oriented. Find out if he cares or does not care about his parents or if he is barely available for them even when they reach out to him. You just have to borrow yourself some sense and do the needful.
Any man who can abandon or speak to his parents without much respect can do same to you and not care one bit. Don’t claim that your love can make him change.
Watch out too if he has a mind of his own or he’s easily manipulated and controlled by his family. Some mothers are controlling that their sons would literally seek their approval to even have sex with their wives.
Make sure to find out if he’s in debt. Some men are heavily indebted that they get dragged around every day by different people including neighbors.
Find out why he is in any debt situation, business gone wrong or he lives above his means. Living above his means is a sign of bigger trouble if you both eventually get married.
Does he believe his neighbors properties are also his? Does he borrow everything including bucket, detergent, toothpaste, salt, sugar, spoon, plate, seasoning, stove, pot, oil, TV, video player, remote, clothes, comb, water, car battery, pressing iron, and water without thinking?
Is he always shamelessly knocking on neighbors doors to borrow things and seldom returns such things? He borrows not because he’s broke or cannot afford those things, he borrows because he’s not organized and doesn’t see it as anything.
What is his likely reaction when provoked or doesn’t get what he wants? Does he have any mental disorders? Is he hot tempered and uncontrollable when angry?
Does he have obsessive compulsive disorder? Is he very controlling, narcissistic, spiteful, unforgiving, emotionally or physically abusive?
Some men in all sincerity need to be seeing a psychiatrist or counselor for serious intervention. Many are a ticking timebomb, just a little spark and they explode. Be in the know who you are dealing with.
Is he married, divorced, separated or he’s a serial monogamist? A serial monogamist once he gets bored or unhappy moves on to something new and fresh. Is he’s a baby Daddy, how many kids does he have and how many women are involved?
These are very important information that should guide and prepare you for the future. Don’t close your eyes to his abnormal behaviour and call it love and attention.
Do you suspect he’s gay or bi-sexual? Has he given you reasons to suspect he’s fronting you as a cover? Decide if you can deal with that in marriage or not and deal with it.
Does he eat your food for free without any form of financial contribution? Is he always telling you what he would like to eat, but never contributes a dime, neither does he once in a while give you money for upkeep or food allowance?
Be careful for nothing, some men feel they have no financial commitment what so ever to women who are financially buoyant and they carry this mentality into marriage.
If he’s into substance abuse, always high on something be it hard drugs or alcohol, use your tongue to count your teeth, old habits don’t die easily.
If you fight and threaten his numerous girlfriends while with him, get ready to fight more even in marriage to keep him. Just be prepared for whatever you decide to get into.
Do not ignore these signs while dating and be quick to call your marriage quits on grounds of irreconcilable differences for signs that were there all along.